Do Not Attempt

One of my favorite commercials right now is the Allstate commercial where the guy is hanging off the side of a SUV mimicking a blind spot.  While the guy is hanging off the side of the vehicle delivering his monolog on auto insurance and car crashes at the bottom of the screen it says do not attempt.  Really do not attempt, I don’t know what’s worse the fact that the disclaimer is there or the fact that if it wasn’t there some idiot would try it and almost die if not die and then the idiot or his family would sue for millions and properly win.  Why because no one told him not to do it.  It seems like the more advance we become as a society the dumber we become in the common sense department basic inferences about life and day to day living seem to be escaping us.  My almond cookie lotion actually says not intended for internal use on the side of the jar.  My philosophy if you have to be told not to ingest or inset lotion into you body you don’t deserve lotion, you deserve to be ashy.

It’s 2011 almost 2012 and we still have signs up in bathrooms that read employees must wash hands and at gas stations that read don’t smoke while pumping gas.  I have no doubt that one-day we’ll become technologically advanced beyond our wildest imagination but need signs up that say when breathing you must inhale first and exhale second.  Because if we don’t someone will sue, because no one told them to exhale after inhaling and they passed out.